Yeah, Lube is the right word. I always go to Jiffy Lube. And I always feel swindled when I leave. I used to come here and get every service they offered. Then I always felt bad because of the swindle. “you are about due for a manifold rotation to check your automated cylinder pressure in the catalytic cuff, Mr. Rape Victim… Uh, I mean Mr. Jefferson”… Then I’d leave $200 poorer. So I started saying no to everything they said: “Would you like the upgraded package?” No. “Your fluid fluid looks low, would you like to top that off?” No. “Have a nice day, Mr. Jefferson!” No. And now I feel like my car could blow up at any moment.

Yeah, Lube is the right word.

I always go to Jiffy Lube. And I always feel swindled when I leave. I used to come here and get every service they offered. Then I always felt bad because of the swindle. “you are about due for a manifold rotation to check your automated cylinder pressure in the catalytic cuff, Mr. Rape Victim… Uh, I mean Mr. Jefferson”… Then I’d leave $200 poorer.

So I started saying no to everything they said:

“Would you like the upgraded package?” No.

“Your fluid fluid looks low, would you like to top that off?” No.

“Have a nice day, Mr. Jefferson!” No.

And now I feel like my car could blow up at any moment.